on silence

"silence is usually more interesting than the stuff on either side of it."

it's amazing what can be conveyed by saying nothing. in a glance, or in the absence of one. a hesitation. a touch.

and this may seem a silly example to use, but the episode of house we watched last night made masterful use of silence. all too appropriately placed, with regards to the conversation.

i wonder that it doesn't work like this for everyone. there are people we can each hear perfectly clearly when they say nothing, and there are people we would never know had "said" anything at all.

in my eval & treatment class last fall, during one lecture the prof emphasized the usefulness of silence as a treatment/counseling tool. if you say nothing for long enough, eventually the other person will fill in. i was the idiot who raised my hand in answer to his question. "i'm really uncomfortable with silence. i always feel the need to fill it. ... especially in some situations. ... like if i'm talking with a professor, and i've finished what i have to say, but they don't say anything yet, and i wonder if i've left something out. ... kinda like you're doing, right now." it doesn't work this way with every person; i suppose it's stronger when we think we are expected to speak. probably with those people who you don't expect will hear you if you say nothing.

and then, there are times when it's completely inappropriate to say anything.

[to return to: silence as a storytelling tool?]