for the first time, i'm scared to post the newest sonnet, for the same reasons i was trying to write the other night.
ironic--i was trying to post something with a comment about how it's only appropriate/safe to say on a blog, and i couldn't connect to the server--ergo, COULD NOT BLOG!
the gist of it was, there are certain things i could write here that i could only write here, because there's the smallest chance that the person they're about would read them, but it is infinitesimal because nobody ever actually reads my blog. so it would be like saying it, but without saying it, because nobody would hear it. but it's out there. so it's sort of like the responsibility is on them now, instead of me. i'm sure many people have similar feelings.
oh, to hell with it.
sonnet 47
if words would come, would that the problem be?
or is it that i feel the words too much?
no voice i'll give, for fear that, since it's me,
i'm doomed to ruin everything i touch.
i have this history of voiced mistakes,
where all is fine until my foolish speech;
i've grown accustomed to the loss this makes--
you'd think it would a diff'rent lesson teach.
however, if you chose to give it voice
(or even noticed that i show int'rest),
i would applaud the boldness of that choice
and hope it ended better than the rest.
if you would take this choice out of my hands,
a happy ending's given better chance.
--september 26, 2006
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